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Monday 1 March 2010

Dead Awful

Thanks to fabulous show that is True Blood, I have recently started reading the Charlaine Harris series of books that the show is based upon.  Anyone that has watched the show will tell you it's a sexy, irreverent, piece of drama with enough sex, violence & fangs to satisfy any gothic urges you may have.  The books on the other hand . . !  

Well with such snappy titles as Club Dead, Definitely Dead & All Together Dead you can understand why I was a little dubious cracking open the first book (Dead Until Dark in case you were wondering).  I must admit I was pleasantly surprised.  Don't get me wrong, I don't see Charlaine Harris walking off with a Booker prize anytime soon but 'Dead Until Dark' is a perfectly enjoyable bit of fluffy fantasy.  In fact, I was so surprised by how competent the first book was that I got myself the next 4 in the series.  

Oh, what foolish creatures we mortals can be!

The second in the series was readable, barely.  However and about ten pages from the end I had to put it down in shame when this Mills & Boon moment was unleashed from our brooding hero, Vampire Bill:  
'It's lovely, but you may be slightly overdressed for the occasion.'
'What occasion would that be?'
'The best sex of your life.'

Aagggghhhhh! 
 
Why then you ask did I pick up the third book this weekend?  I'm afraid I'm not sure.  Obviously some dark corner of my mind is using this series as a form of self flagellation for some unspoken crime.  Or maybe, just maybe, I'm hoping the books improve.  

That being said I think I'm really done now.  I just can't do it to myself any longer.  I've realised I love myself too much.  Oh and I have Charlaine Harris herself to thank for this revelation.  Nice and early into book 3 Charlaine gave me the push I needed to put the novels down for good.  Thank you Ms Harris.  Oh and in case you're curious, the offending paragraph is below:
 

'BIll's Missing,' Pam said, shooting from the conversational hip.
'No, he's not.  He's in Seattle,' I said.  Willfully obtuse.  I had learned that word from my Word-A-Day calendar only that morning, and here I was getting to use it.
Umm yeah, someone might need to have a word with the narrator about what is wrong with this scene!
 

6 comments:

  1. See I'd use that 'the best sex of your life' line. I reckon I could really make that work.

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  2. lol Jon why did that just make me think of this: http://jamescordenfansite.files.wordpress.com/2008/05/corden_dailymail.jpg

    Bad Jon!

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  3. That may well become my new facebook photo.

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  4. Lol you really need to do that. It might help you cut down the friend numbers.

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  5. I take it you won,t be reading the aptly named dead and gone then and now you are thinking how the hell does my mum know about that

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  6. Lol i might force it on myself yet. Oh and you're right, you are obviously a secret vampire groupie too. I don't mind as long as i don't see you in an 'I heart twilight' tee lol.

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